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The Return of Jafar
(Arabian Nights) Peddler (Narrator): Follow me to a place where incredible feats Are routine every hour or so Where enchantment runs rampant Yes, wild in the streets Open sesame, here we go! Arabian nights Like Arabian days They tease and excite Take off and take flight They shock and amaze Arabian nights Like Arabian days More often than not are hotter than hot In a lot of good ways Pack your shield, pack your sword You won't ever get bored Though get beaten or gored you might Come on down, stop on by Hop a carpet and fly To another Arabian night Arabian night Thief #1: This night has been quite rewarding. Thief #2: (laughing) We have never stolen so much. We have gathered much loot tonight. No thanks to our leader. Abis Mal: Well, it only looked expensive. Is this a haul or what, my surly band of desert skunks? Thief #1: How is it you get the jeweled flower, Abis Mal? Abis Mal: Why, this is my bonus for being your beloved leader. This and that and that are my beloved leader bonus. Thief #1: And what is our reward? All Thieves: Hmm? Abis Mal: Here you go. Good work, boys. Very successful raid. All Thieves: Hmm? (grunting) Thief #1: The chest! It moves! Thief #2: It cannot be! Thief #1: What is holding it up? Abis Mal: (screaming) Ah! Ghosts! Abu: Hello. Abis Mal: You stupid monkey! Aladdin: Put him down, Abis Mal! Abis Mal: Who are you? Aladdin: My friends call me Al. You can call me Aladdin. Abis Mal: Hurt him! What? Where did he go? There! He has our loot! Don't let him get away! He must not escape! Stop him! Thief #3: Why, you... Aladdin: Hey! He's getting away! There he is! We've got him now! Abis Mal: A flying carpet? He's got a flying carpet! Aladdin: Nice catch, Carpet. Hey! Aladdin: Pardon me! Yeah! Come back here! That's mine! Whoa! Aladdin: Next stop, Agrabah. Shut the door! He's escaping! (Setting: The Seven Deserts) Iago: Finally! (grunting) This is terrific! (grunts and Jafar’s lamp is pulled out of the hole bouncing plus Iago getting sand in his ears)I got sand in places I didn't even know I had. Jafar: Spare me your prattling, Iago! Are we out yet? Iago: "Are we out yet? Are we out yet?"Yes, we're out! No thanks to you. If it weren't for me you'd be stuck down there forever. Jafar: Iago! You will now release me so that I may have my revenge. Iago: Yeah, yeah, when I'm good and ready. Jafar: Do as I say, you worthless pipsqueak! Iago: You know something? You're nothing without me. Jafar: What?! Iago: Who comes up with all the good ideas? Me! Who does all the work? Me! Jafar: If it weren't for me, you still be in a cage at the bazaar "squawking, "Polly want a cracker!" (I'm Looking Out for Me) Iago: That's it, I've had it I hate to be dramatic But it's time for me to fly the coop Terrific, fine I'm drawing the line Before I wind up in a parrot soup I was a fool to let you run the show I'm cutting you loose, pal Look out below (Jafar screaming as Iago threw the lamp off of a well splashing with water) Arrividerci, c'est la vie Hope all goes well I'm looking out for me (Settings: Agrabah and Marketplace) Iago: (speaking) Agrabah. Just a juicy golden goose ready for plucking and I'm the one holding the tweezers! I'll be running this town inside a week! (Iago pointing a finger in a camel’s nose) What's your problem, liver lips? You don't think I can do it?! Iago: OK, I'm little Been playing second fiddle And I don't get no respect (The camel spitting at Iago’s tail) I turn the other cheek But this busted beak Is the only thanks that I get I never found a friend that I can trust They promise caviar and leave me eating dust That's some reward for loyalty From here on in I'm looking' out for me Ohh, I don't need nobody else I'll never fail I'll cover my own tail I can take care of myself You know, it just don't pay to give a hoot I've given all my heart What do I get? The boot I'm through with that I'm flapping' free From here on in I'm looking' out for me Omar: Steal from us again and your scrawny body will be dinner for the jackals! Iago: Sure. No problem. Abu: Huh? No! No! Aladdin: Abu! Abu: Yeah! Aladdin: We're not the ones who needed this money. Poor Mother: A miracle. Agrabah Citizen #1: Rain on me! Agrabah Citizen #2: Gold from the heavens! Aladdin: Don't worry, Abu. I'm not throwing everything. Abu: Yes! Aladdin: This is for Jasmine. Abu: No! Aladdin: Whoa! Abu: Uh-oh. Aladdin: Easy, Rajah. You know me. Aladdin?v OK, Rajah, OK. I'm glad to see you, too. How do I look? Jasmine: I think you look fine. Aladdin: Jasmine! Jasmine: Where were you? I missed you. Aladdin: I had to pick up a few things. This is for you. Jasmine: Oh, Aladdin! It's lovely! It must’ve cost a fortune. Aladdin: Oh, no, it was a steal. Jasmine: Father wants you to join us for dinner tonight. He's going to make a royal announcement. Aladdin: And he wants me there? Jasmine: It's about you. Aladdin: Am I in trouble? Jasmine: Let's just say this is a dinner you don't want to miss. Aladdin: Jasmine, what's going on? Jasmine: I promised Father I wouldn't spoil his surprise. You've made quite an impression, you know. Aladdin: So I'm not in trouble? Jasmine: Of course not. You defeated Jafar, saved Agrabah and rescued a princess. Aladdin, you are a hero. Aladdin: Yeah, I guess so. That's me. Ready for anything! Abu! Jasmine: You may want to change before dinner, though. Iago: Seems like only yesterday. Jafar was running Agrabah. And I was his right-hand bird. But then he had to go and mess things up! Now I'm stuck on the outside looking in. I gotta get back into the palace! Back into power! Aladdin: Well, my dear Abu, shall we see what the common folk are doing today? Abu: Let's go! Aladdin: (laughing) We have time for a stroll before our audience with the Sultan. Iago: The street rat is living in the palace now? That does it! All reports are in! Life is now officially unfair! Wait! Wait a second here! This is perfect! That kid is my ticket back into power. I'll just get Aladdin on my side with a little sympathy act. Then I'll be back in the palace again quicker than you can say "Easy Street." Aladdin! Huh? Kid... finally... got free... of... Jafar. Aladdin: Iago! What are you doing here? Iago: Where are you? Getting dark... Hold me... Hey, I meant gentle-like! Aladdin: You're not fooling anyone! Iago: No, wait, I'm serious! I was under Jafar's power! He mesmerized me with his snake staff! Just like the sultan. Aladdin: You traitor, you! Abis Mal: You… look familiar. All Thieves: It's Aladdin. Abis Mal: Where?! It is? I knew that! Hurt him a lot! Hurt him and his monkey and his bird, too! Uh-oh. Thief #1: Treacherous parrot! Iago: Look, I'm not with him! Monkey, help! They're after me! Thief #3: You won't dance out of this one! Iago: That's it! Now I'm mad! Mess with this bird, huh? Thieves: Huh? Iago: And I got more where that came from! Egg Merchant: My eggs... ruined! Who will pay for them? Abis Mal: Oh, go away. Egg Merchant: Guards! Guards! Razoul: What is the trouble here? Fazahl: It is that thief, Abis Mal! Abis Mal: Whoa! Razoul: After them! Iago: Jerks. Aladdin: Thanks for your help. You saved me. Iago: I did? Right! Oh, yeah! Of course I saved you! It's my nature. I'm always rescuing things. Cats, babies, guys like you, always rescuing. Hey, what's going on?! Is this any way to treat your rescuer?! You owe me, pal! I saved your life! Aladdin: Abu, wait! He's right. I do owe him. Abu: Huh? Aladdin: I'll see that the sultan gives him a fair hearing. Iago: What?! The Sultan?! Aladdin: Don't worry, I'll talk to him. Soften him up a little. Iago: Are you kidding? He hates me! And what about the princess?! Aladdin: Hmm? No problem. I just have to make sure that Jasmine doesn't see you... until I've gotten her prepared. Jasmine: Gotten me prepared for what? Aladdin: Ah! I mean... uhh, um, for the... for the... for the stain... Abu got on the brand new vest you gave him. Abu: I did not! Jasmine: I don't see a stain. Aladdin: Uh, well, no problem, then. Off to dinner. Can't wait for that surprise. Jasmine: Is something wrong? Aladdin: Huh? Wrong? Oh, come on! No, no, no, everything's just fine. Jasmine: You aren't... hiding anything from me, are you? Any more... secrets? Aladdin: Ssss... Secrets? Of course not! I almost lost you once that way. I’ll never make that mistake again. Aladdin & Jasmine (Both): What? (A whirlpool of water appears down on the pool and makes a very artistic and big splash along with both hugging scared. Suddenly, Genie with his Hawaiian shirt, hat, surfboard, bags of souvenirs, and a luau necklace reappears and comes back from his vacation plus he jumps off from the wave with Aladdin and Jasmine smiling.) Genie: He's big, he's blue and he's back! (breaks the fourth wall with his face getting closer to the audience) Aladdin: Genie! Jasmine: You came back! Genie: Oh! Ah! Oh! Watch the sunburn! (turning red as sunburnt skin) Aha! Kidding! Did you miss me? Be honest. Take care of these, my good mammal. Abu: Whoa! Careful, they're heavy! Hang on, I got souvenirs for everybody! Whoo! She dances! Aladdin: You saw the whole world already? Genie (as It's a Small World figures): It's a small world after all Genie: But Agrabah has something that no other place in the world has. (Turning into a red firework rocket (since the first film) and Aladdin & Jasmine getting on him and blasting off from Agrabah to the world) Genie (as a rocket): You guys! (Nothing in the World (Quite Like a Friend)) Genie: I parachuted down into the Taj Mahal I Rollerbladed all along the Great Wall I even made the famous leaning tower fall But who was with me through it all? Nobody The Moscow Circus hired me to fly trapeze On Mount Olympus, won a race with Hercules It's easy when you're chased by killer bees "Who said "Gesundheit" when I sneezed?" So now I'm home Home again with you You chase the clouds away Whenever I am blue Aladdin (speaking): You're always blue. Land of the pyramids I highly recommend There is nothing in the world Quite like a friend Slept like a babe in Bombay on a bed of nails Moroccans loved my daring Dance of Seven Veils Why, single-handedly, I even saved the whales No one was there to hear my tales In Acapulco, joined a mariachi band I rode the raging rapids down the Rio Grande Flew in an air balloon, but when I tried to land Nobody laughed or lent a hand Without you, the Amazon is just a trickle Without you, the Sahara's not so hot Without you, Niagara Falls is just a leaky faucet The QE2 is just some yacht Now that I'm home Home again, it's clear All I ever wanted Seems to be right here I've traveled east and west And now I'm back again And there's nothing in the world Quite like a friend Aladdin: There's nothing in the world Jasmine: Nothing in the whole wide world Aladdin, Jasmine & Genie (All): There is nothing in the world Quite like a friend Genie: Nothing in the whole wide world Aladdin: So, Genie, how does it feel to be free? Genie: Seriously? I love it! (breaking his back) OK, maybe my powers aren't what they used to be. Let's say they're semi-phenomenal, nearly cosmic, (shrinking short) but don't sell me short. I may be free, but I still have some magic in me. I can still do this! Hey! Hate to lose face in front of you guys. Give me another chance. Who's first? I can do this! Aladdin: Genie, we have to go to... Jasmine: Dinner! We're late! Genie: You probably have a romantic dinner for two planned. You don't need a big blue lug gumming up the works. Aladdin: But, Genie... Genie: Three's a crowd. You kids go on. Jasmine: Genie, I would be honored if you'd join us for dinner. Genie: You would? Come on, everyone! Get in here! Home cooking? Let's go! Abu: Oh, boy! Aladdin: Not you, Abu. You have a job to do, remember? Abu: Huh? Aladdin: You have to guard Iago! Abu: Oh! (walking away) Genie: Giddy-up, slow-poke. What's keeping ya? Aladdin: Nothing! Well, something, but I'll tell you later. Abis Mal: That stinking Aladdin. First chance I get, I'll slice him in half. Thief #1: (imitating Abis Mal) That stinking Abis Mal. Thief #2: First chance we get, let's slice him in half. Abis Mal: Hey, get over here and wash up! It's bad enough I have to look at you without having to smell you. Thief #2: Come, we do it now. No witnesses. Abis Mal: (getting the lamp out of a well with a bucket of water splashed from his head) Ow! What is this? So help me, I'll sue whoever runs this well. A lamp. (chuckling) Well, well, it might be worth a few shekels once it's cleaned up. Thief #2: It will be of little use to you, Abis Mal! Except to light your way to the Valley of the Dead! (Trying to kill Abis Mal with their swords pointing) Thief #2: It is bewitched! (Red smoke was released from the black lamp with Jafar’s evil laughing and drives away Abis Mal’s men in defeat with their horses neighing and running away and Genie Jafar appears) Genie Jafar: I am free! Free with that vengeance upon he who has imprisoned me! (Trying to be free but his golden cuffs have stuck up on him which he was trying to get away because of the curse) Genie Jafar: (grunting) It is the curse of the lamp. (His black lamp was glowing) All the power in the universe and I am bound by the rules of the genie! Which means I can't kill that upstart Aladdin! Unless I have someone arrange it for me. Take me to Agrabah at once! (Taking his lamp with gravity and coming closer to scare Abis Mal like some of a coward) Genie Jafar: I suppose I am a bit too much for his limited mind. (Turning from his Genie from to his normal form and Abis Mal leaping away like a frog) Jafar: I trust you'll find me a little less overwhelming now? Abis Mal: You're... a genie? Jafar: You are astonishingly perceptive. Abis Mal: Um, eh, um… If you're a genie, then, eh, don't I get wishes? Jafar: Yes, three wishes. That is a minor formality. But, first, I must go to Agrabah. You will take the lamp there for me. Abis Mal: Then... uh… you need me. I'll uh… take you to Agrabah but, first, I want my wishes. (Jafar is angry, releasing red laser-like powers to zap Abis Mal so close and he’s about to strike a punch.) Jafar: Why, you... You shall have your wishes. Abis Mal: I shall? I mean, of course I shall! (laughing evilly) Oh, I want... I want riches, treasure! Let's see, I know, uh… I wish for the legendary sunken treasure ship of Coeur du Mer! Jafar: Your wish is my command. (teleports) (Setting: The Sunken Treasure Ship of Coeur du Mer: Abis Mal trying to get out of this place, but a tentacle trying to grab him and the shark trying to scare and eat him but Jafar blocks the shark away) Jafar: (holding Abis Mal like a baby and pushing him) Poor sweet baby. Aren't we enjoying our wish? Abis Mal: No. (answering with water mumbled in his mouth) Jafar: Perhaps you wish me to return you to the desert? Abis Mal: Yes! (mumbling from water with a tentacle grabbing him again) Jafar: Very well. (taking Abis Mal back into the Desert and he spits water out) That was two wishes. Take your time with the third. Or you will wish you had never been born. Abis Mal: Gulp! Jafar: On the other hand, if you cooperate with me, I will see that you are amply rewarded. Abis Mal: Rewarded? Jafar: First, you will help me get revenge on a certain street rat by the name of... Aladdin. Abis Mal: (gasps) Aladdin?! I want revenge on him, too! He robbed me, turned my men against me and he fought dirty! My brilliant swordsmanship availed me naught! (cuts his pants down with his circle underwear) I hate when I do that. Jafar: (grabbing Abis Mal’s shirt) Let's not be too hasty, my simple-minded friend. It's not enough that we simply destroy Aladdin. (dropping him to the ground) After all, there are things so much worse than death. (Laughing evilly and Abis Mal grinning menacingly) (Setting: The Sultan’s Palace Dining Room) Genie (as a chef): OK, prepare yourselves for a real culinary treat. (Genie chopping carrots as fast with karate sounds) Sultan: (laughing with joy) Oh-ho-ho-ho, my! Genie: (his hand cut off) Whoopsie. Sultan: Most amusing! Genie: Amusing, right. Excuse me while I pull myself together. Sultan: (laughing) Absolutely delightful! Now, to business. Aladdin, you have proven to be a man of strong moral character. That is why I've decided to make you my new royal vizier. Aladdin: Me? Really? Jasmine: Isn't it wonderful? Genie: Wow! Royal vizier! Aladdin would like to thank the Academy for this great honor! You want 'em? We got 'em! Royal vizier t-shirts! All hail Aladdin, the royal vizier! (turns back into normal) So, uh, what's a royal vizier? Sultan: Well... he will be my most trusted advisor. Genie: Well, that makes sense (spitting). He's bound to be better than that Jafar character. (Genie’s head turning into Jafar’s) Sultan: Quite so! Genie: And Iago. Talk about a rat with wings! Aladdin: Genie? Genie: Ooh! That bird was mean! (his face disguised as Iago with a cracker) Sultan want a cracker? (double) Remember that? Sultan: I can still taste them! The traitor! Genie: Yes, sir! You don't see this guy hanging out with any evil parrots! Aladdin: It's funny you should mention Iago. (Setting: The Sultan's Palace Gardens at night with Iago on his cage and Abu still guarding him.) Iago: Oh, monkey! (making monkey noises) Come on! Monkey, little birdie want to talk to monkey. Have nice banana. (making monkey noises again) Birdie get monkey a pretty banana... if monkey open cage. Yum, yum! Abu: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Iago: (angrily) Come on! I've got a wife and three eggs! (sadly) Imagine them hatching, never knowing their daddy! (afraid) Come on, open the cage! Open it! Open it! Open it! Yeah, that's more like it. Ah! (Rajah growling at him from trying to get out of his cage) Close the cage! Close it! Close it! Close it! (Rajah destroying his cage and falling to the ground and chasing him through the Sultan's Palace interior (setting) screaming for help) Abu: Uh-oh! Iago: Your monkey's trying to kill me! I saved your life! It's payback time, Aladdin! Whoa! Aladdin! Jasmine: Rajah! You know better than to tear around the palace like that! Iago: Help! Hey! Sultan: So, Aladdin, why did you bring up that deceitful parrot? Aladdin: Sultan, I have to tell you something about Iago. (gulping) He's here. Sultan: (gasping) Iago! Guards! Aladdin: No, wait! You don't understand! Sultan: Get that bird! Razoul: Yes, your Highness. It would be my pleasure. Aladdin: No, Sultan! No! Razoul: Move out of my way, boy! Aladdin: You don't understand! Just listen! I have a... Razoul: Your Highness! Sultan: I trust he has a fitting explanation for this… this scandal? Jasmine: He had better. Aladdin: Your Highness, I… I think Iago was... uh… Iago: Mesmerized. Aladdin: Yeah, yeah! He was under Jafar's spell. Remember the snake staff? Iago was only... uh… um… Look, I just... Iago's not all that bad. Uh, at least, I don't think so anyway. Iago: Shoulda stuck with the snake staff defense. Sultan: Not all bad? He only served my greatest enemy, that's all! Razoul: We can't allow that traitorous bird to run free! Aladdin: Then I'll watch him! Uh, your Highness, I meant, uh, with your permission, I'd like to take full responsibility for Iago. Iago: You would? Sultan: Your priorities seem questionable to me, but so be it. Aladdin, you will watch Iago every moment. (The Sultan walking off and Razoul coming here to Aladdin) Razoul: And if the bird makes one wrong move, you shall be the one I pluck, boy. Genie: Eh, that could've gone worse. Aladdin: Ugh, Jasmine, I thought I was sunk. Iago: Oh, not good! Jasmine: You were hiding Iago all along, weren't you?! Genie: I think it just got worse. Aladdin: Well, yes, but... Jasmine: How could you? More secrets? More lies? Aladdin, I thought you had changed. Aladdin: Jasmine, wait! Eh, back in the marketplace... Iago... he... (Jasmine slams the palace doors and he sighs) he saved my life. (picking up his turban and sighing) Some grand vizier I'm gonna make. Everybody's mad at me. Genie: Hey, Jasmine's just a little (turning into a Mrs. Potts-like teapot) steamed. She'll cool down. Care for a cup? (asking Aladdin for a cup of tea to cheer him up but not) Ugh, this isn't cheering you up, is it? (Trying to give it to Abu and he doesn’t like tea.) Aladdin: I don't get it, Genie. I try to do something good and it… it blows up in my face. (walking away into the fountain) Genie: (and Abu sighs) That's the problem with doing the right thing. Sometimes you do it by yourself. Iago: That kid saved my life. Nobody's ever looked out for me before. Now, it's like I owe him. Nah! Genie: Just let your conscience be your guide. (turning into Jiminy Cricket from Pinocchio) Iago: Conscience? Never had one. Never. (flying away) Genie: (laughing crazily with turning into a Genie-in-the-Box to annoy Iago and falling off) Iago: Hoo! What are you trying to do, give me a heart attack? Genie: (turning into a vet) A-ha! You do have a heart! (showing Iago’s X-ray) An itty-bitty one, but it is there. (teleporting Iago with sparkling magic) Iago: Can you quit with the hocus pocus already? Genie: Look at him. Would it kill you to do something nice for him? Iago: Possibly. (letting go of Genie’s fists) I don't do "nice." Genie: Oh, come on! It’ll be fun! (his Jack in a Box-like face with two yellow flags, red eyes with spirals, red and black beard, and spinning hair plus checkered teeth) Iago: I don't do fun, either! Genie: (in multiple forms) We have to get Al and the princess (in one form) back together! Iago: Look, I definitely don't do mushy stuff! It's not me! Genie: I know, but it's going to be tricky. Iago: Tricky is good. Tricky I can do. (Settings: Jasmine’s Room & Balcony: When Jasmine was laying down on her bed crying after being upset with Aladdin, Iago comes near her balcony door grille.) Iago: Come on, Princess! (Jasmine showing Iago when stopped crying) Don't waste your tears on him. Jasmine: You! Get out of here! (shutting her curtains on Iago) Iago: Hey, don't take it out on me! He's the creep. I never should have saved his life. Jasmine: Saved his life? (opening her curtains) Iago: Yeah. He owed me one. That's why he stood up for me. Jasmine: But he didn't have to lie to me. Iago: You are so right. (Forget Above Love) Iago: Forget about that guy Forget about the way you fell into his eyes Forget about his charms Forget about the way he held you in his arms Walking on air's obnoxious The thrills, the chills Will make you nauseous And you'll never get enough Just forget about love (talking) She's buying it! Now make with the magic! Iago: Forget about romance Forget about the way your heart begins to dance Aladdin: Jasmine. Iago: Then you feel the blush When he's spouting out some sentimental mush Love really is revolting It's even worse than when you're molting Enough of this fluff Just forget about love Jasmine: I had almost forgotten the way it felt When he held out his hand for mine My heart all a-flutter Iago: Oh, how I shudder Jasmine: The first time we kissed Iago: It won't be missed Forget about his touch Jasmine: I can't forget about his touch Iago: In the scheme of things it doesn't matter much Jasmine: It matters so much Iago: You're better on your own A meal becomes a banquet when you eat alone Both: Love's filled with compromises Iago: And don't you hate those big surprises Jasmine: A cozy rendezvous Iago: Oh, please Jasmine: Candlelight for two Iago: Oh, jeez Jasmine: Look, you're calling my bluff I can't forget about love Both: Just forget about love Aladdin: (speaking) Uh, Jasmine, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kept Iago a secret. Please... Jasmine: (speaking) Aladdin, you don't have to... Shh. Jasmine: I can't forget about my heart Aladdin: I can't forget about my heart Jasmine: And how it felt to fall for you right from the start Aladdin: I'm still falling Jasmine: Whatever we may do Aladdin: Whatever we may do Jasmine: You are here for me and I'll be there for you Aladdin & Jasmine (Both): I'll be there To wish, to want, to wander To find the sun through rain and thunder Aladdin: A cozy rendezvous Jasmine: Yes, please Aladdin: Candlelight for two Iago: Oh, jeez Enough is enough Aladdin & Jasmine (Both): We can't forget about love (Animation switches from former Walt Disney Television Australia to former Walt Disney Television Japan.) Abis Mal: We did it! We're in! Jafar: It's about time. It was getting hot. How very like Iago. He's lost no time endearing himself to those in power. Which fits in perfectly with my plan. Aladdin: I'm sorry, Jasmine. Genie: Ahh, love. Don't mind us. Aladdin: Yeah, well, this is kind of a special moment. Genie: Right. Got it. Say no more. Enough said. Roger. Over and out. Rolling! Today's special moments are tomorrow's memories. Looking great, Jas. More emotion, Al. Tilt your chin a bit. Iago: What does he have to do to make it clear to you lunkheads?! The show's over. They want to be alone! Break it up! (pushing Genie and Carpet) Jasmine: Are you sure about him? Iago: Move it, primate! Shoo! Go on! (Abu is trying to hit Iago and he is trying to bite Abu on the back like a lion to chase him away) That takes care of the peanut gallery. If you need me, I'll be lazing about in the lap of luxury. Aladdin: I'm sure about this. Iago: Ohh, yeah! Being one of the good guys has its advantages. Ah, advisor to Aladdin, the new grand vizier. And when Aladdin becomes Sultan, that will make me the grand vizier. Only I'm not gonna blow it like that idiot Jafar. (eating all the grapes) I'll never have to stand in his shadow again. (spitting out the grapes and looking at him scared in the light with a black of darkness) Jafar! Buddy? (Jafar is unleashing two fireballs in his eyes to light the candles for him) Iago: (laughs) A funny thing happened. You see, this guy took the lamp. You probably thought it was me, cause it sounded a lot like me... but a lot of people sound like me. Anyway, he took the lamp and... (screams) Jafar: (turning into a talking column) Calm yourself, Iago. I haven't come for revenge against you. Iago: (laughs) So that's good to hear. Abis Mal: I got it! I could wish for the famed treasure chest of King Malakhan! (Jafar turning into Abis Mal into a golden treasure chest, putting Iago down on the green sofa and mumbling in fear and panic plus turning it back into human form) Jafar: Oh, I am dreadfully sorry. I thought that was your wish. Are you quite all right? Abis Mal: No, I am not quite... Jafar: Wonderful. Good to see all is well. Abis Mal here is my new friend and I couldn't help noticing that you've made some new friends, too. Like, Aladdin. (Poking Iago’s beak and turning into Cheshire Cat-like smoke with red eyes and vanishes) Iago: Friend? Uh, friend is such a strong word. He's, eh, he’s more like an acquaintance. Jafar: (appearing again into human form from flames in candles with evil shadows) I'm arranging a little surprise for Aladdin and your job is to lead him to the party. Iago: You know, (pants) I don't think I'm the guy for this job. You know, you should talk to… uh… uh… the monkey! Yeah! The monkey's really got Aladdin's ear! Jafar: No, Iago... you! (pointing a finger on his beak) Iago: (walking back and forth) You know, Aladdin, ahem, Al, here's an idea. I was just thinking... Genie: Focus... focus. (6 times) (Iago flying off to the game room at the palace playing pool with Carpet and Abu) Aiming... and... shoot! (Genie focusing the billiard table and shooting the white ball into Iago’s mouth accidentally and Carpet catching him) Genie: Oh, ho. Sorry, little feathered friend. I'll get that out. It's stuck good. Cue Ball Ectomy! Nurse! (turning into a doctor and Abu into Nurse Heimlich plus he’s throwing a nurse hat on a table and giving it back to him) Genie: Abu! (Abu trying to take out his eyelashes) Iago here's our friend now. We can trust him. Now, let's get that ball out of his beak. What do you say? Abu: Oh, uh, oh, OK. (Iago screaming and Abu putting out the ball which he stuck into his beak and bouncing back on a table) Genie: Brilliant, Nurse Heimlich! Iago: (coughing) Thanks... (cough) Bobo. Genie: It's Abu. Iago: Whatever. Genie: That's the spirit! We're all one big family now! (Genie hugging Abu and Iago) Iago: Yeah, sure. Family. Abu: Oh, brother. Iago: Yeah, well, I gotta find Al. Genie: Your shot. (playing pool with Carpet) Pool's a man's game, so being a rug, you'll be at a disadvan... Ah, pool's a dumb game anyway. Aladdin: I can't explain it, Jasmine. I think we can trust Iago. Jasmine: Well... then I guess I can give him a chance. Aladdin: Iago? (Iago sneaking off and stops) Iago: Eh... I… I was just thinking... um. Maybe it's time you patched things up with the Sultan. He might enjoy... a nice scenic carpet ride? Jasmine: That's a good idea. Aladdin: And I'll bring Genie. He was a big hit with the Sultan. Iago: No, no, no! I mean, uh… Genie's... he's too flashy! He's too loud! You'll never get a word in. Jasmine: Good point, Iago. You need some quiet time with Father. Let him get to know you. Iago: Yeah! And I... I can take you to the perfect spot. Aladdin: Great! Jasmine: Come on, let's get Father. Just a minute. Iago? This isn't easy for me to say, but I was wrong about you. (kissing Iago’s top head) Iago: (grunts worryingly) Wait a second! Aladdin: Yes, Iago? (Jafar’s evil eyes are looking and watching Iago) Iago: Uh… I'll be alone in a minute. Jafar: (putting his hands on Iago) Excellent. (Setting: The Sultan's Palace Gardens) Jasmine: Give them a chance, Father. Sultan: Oh, I'll try, dearest. Aladdin: After you, Your Highness. All right, Carpet, let's go! Sultan: Whoopee! Jasmine: Have a good time! Genie: Hey, hey! Clear the way! Make room for the picnic boys! Jasmine: They already left, Genie. Genie: (gasps) Without us?! Abu: Without us? Genie: No problem! I'll catch up in a flash! Jasmine: Wait! Without me, too! Aladdin needs some time alone with Father to patch things up. Genie: You know what this means, monkey boy? More food for us! (Genie and Abu are chowing up food) Abu: Oh, boy! Genie: (stops eating) I'm sorry. Did you want some? Jasmine: I'm... not hungry just now. You two go ahead. (Genie and Abu are chowing up food again) (Setting: The Seven Deserts: Sultan and Aladdin are flying Carpet to the Oasis along with Iago) Sultan: Come on, my boy! Show me what this thing can really do! Iago: That's the spot! On top of the waterfall! I'm losing my feathers here! Sultan: You're lucky you haven't lost more than that! Oh, what fun! Aladdin: Iago, I have to hand it to you. This is a nice place. Genie: It doesn't get any better than this, eh, Shaggy? How about a nice drumstick? This could use some secret herbs and spices. Spiders! Things could get ugly! Jafar! Abu: Uh-oh! Jafar: Sorry to spoil your picnic, boys, but I can't have any genies mucking about ruining my plans. Genie: Don't worry, Abu. He's a genie, and genies can't kill anyone. But you'd be surprised what you can live through. Jafar: You always were good for a laugh. Genie: Oh, yeah?! Who's laughing now? Jafar: Why, I believe it's me. (You're Only Second Rate) Jafar: I must admit Your parlor tricks are amusing I bet you've got a bunny under your hat Now, here's your chance to get the best of me Hope your hand is hot Come on, clown, let's see what you've got You can try to slam me with your hardest stuff But your double whammy isn't up to snuff I'll set the record straight You're simply out of date, you're only second rate You think your cat's a meanie But your tiger's tame You've got a lot to learn about the genie game So for your education, I'll reiterate You're only second rate Men cower at the power in my pinky My thumb is number one on every list But if you're not convinced that I'm invincible Put me to the test I'd love to lay this rivalry to rest Go ahead and zap me with the big surprise Slap me in a trap, cut me down to size I'll make a great escape, it's just a piece of cake You're only second rate You know, your hocus-pocus isn't tough enough And your mumbo-jumbo doesn't measure up Let me pontificate upon your sorry state You're only second rate Zaba-caba-dabra Granny's gonna grab ya Alakazam-na-bus This thing's bigger than the both of us So spare me your tremendous scare You look horrendous in your underwear And I can hardly wait to discombobulate I'll send ya back and packing in a shipping crate You'll make a better living with a spinning plate You're only second rate (Setting: Jafar's Lab) Abu: Hello? Hello? Jafar: That was invigorating! Come, Abis Mal, we have other lives to ruin. (Setting: The Ruined City of the Oasis) Aladdin: Sultan. Look, I'm sorry for not telling you about Iago. I guess I saw some good in him just like you saw some good in a street rat. Sultan: The good I saw in a... Well, oh, yes, l... I suppose. Well said, my boy! Oh, you'll be a fine vizier! Aladdin: This was a great idea, Iago. Thanks. Iago: Oh, don't thank me. Really. Aladdin: Sultan! Abis Mal?! Sultan: Aladdin! Aladdin: (coughing and grabbing Iago’s tail with he tries to fly away) You traitor! Iago: Traitor is such a strong word. Sultan: Aladdin! Help! Aladdin: I'll settle with you later. Come on, Carpet! Look, they're trapped on the cliff! When they stop, we'll... What? Abis Mal knows magic? Sultan: Whoa! Abis Mal: What? Get him! Get the sultan! Aladdin: Hang on, Sultan! This is where we lose them. Sultan! We have to go back, Carpet! Abis Mal: Yes! Huh? What are you doing?! (The horse man using Jafar’s power not to kill Aladdin, but by saving him in the water) Abis Mal: Are you nuts?! You saved him! He was this close to being a greasy little smear on the rocks! (Multiple horses and men turning into Jafar’s normal self and grabbing Abis Mal’s shirt) Jafar: Look, you little… I mean, my dear Abis Mal. (putting Abis Mal down to the ground) If you remember the plan, it is not yet time for the boy to meet his end. Abis Mal: Um… I knew that. Jafar: Soon, our revenge will be complete and you shall have your third wish. Abis Mal: Ooh boy, oh, my little wishy! (laughing and giggling) Jafar: And you, Iago! (scaring him) You have done well. Iago: Please, don't mention it. (Setting: The River in the evening when Aladdin leads to the shore laying and coughing) Aladdin: Sultan! (panting) Iago. (Walking barefoot from the Seven Deserts to Agrabah) (Setting: Jafar’s Lab) Sultan: Jafar, you fiend! (chained into the wall) I should have known that this was your treachery! Jafar: But I couldn't have done it without Iago. Iago: Eh, I, I played a minor role, really. Abis Mal: Jafar! This rug won't cooperate! (He grabs Carpet when he trips him and Carpet tries to fly free, but Jafar used his power to lock Carpet in chains put a lock along with Genie in a ball and Abu chained into the wall) Sultan: (grunting angrily) Oh, when Aladdin returns... Jafar: I think we have ample time to prepare for his arrival. (giving the Sultan’s hat and his dagger (with his power) to slash the hat in half) Abis Mal: Hey! That was a nice hat. I could have worn that hat! Jafar: We need this for our plan. Abis Mal: Couldn't we use another hat for the plan? Jafar: Oh, no. The sultan's turban and this dagger are exactly what we need… (putting the dagger on Abis Mal’s head closer) …to seal Aladdin's doom. (Repeated scene again with Aladdin walking barefoot and the screen distorts) (Setting: The Sultan’s Palace of Agrabah at night with Aladdin walking and panting to the stairs) Aladdin: Razoul! The sultan's been... (Before he says ”kidnapped by Jafar”, Razoul orders his guards to seize and arrest Aladdin for the murder of the Sultan.) Razoul: Seize him! You are under arrest for the murder of the Sultan! Aladdin: What?! No! (Setting: The Palace Dungeon at night) Razoul: And then you went over the waterfall, eh? Ha! How did you survive? Aladdin: I... I don't know. Razoul: Oh, how very convenient. Aladdin: It's the truth! Why won't you believe me? Jafar (Jasmine): Because we know you're lying! Aladdin: Huh? Jafar (Jasmine): I found this in your room. My father's turban... slashed! Aladdin: You can't think... Jafar (Jasmine): I thought you loved me! But now I see that all you wanted to do was rule Agrabah! Aladdin: I never wanted... Jafar (Jasmine): He shall die at dawn for the murder of my father. Aladdin: Jasmine, please! Razoul: You're in my hands now, street rat! (Setting: Jafar's Lab: Along with Genie in a glass ball with a spider design, Carpet and Abu in chains, Jafar (disguised as Jasmine) locks and chains the real Jasmine into the wall along with the Sultan.) Jafar: (laughing evilly) You should have seen the look on Aladdin's face when Princess Jasmine sentenced him to death. Jasmine: No! Abis Mal: Oh, yes! And then I get my wish. Jafar: Yes, and then you get your wish. Jasmine: (in anger) Iago! I swear one day you will pay for this! Iago: I really think you're making too big a deal out of this. Jafar: Such spirit! (trying to bite Jafar's arm and hand like a lion) Perhaps after a few days in chains you'll be more kindly disposed toward me.(putting his snake staff closely to her) Especially if you want your father to remain healthy! Ah, Iago, you betrayed me and allied yourself with my enemies. Then you turned on them as soon as it was in your best interests. That's what I love about you. You're so perfectly predictable. A villain through and through. Iago: Thank you. Thank you. Whew. (Setting: The Dungeon along with Aladdin locked up in chains) Rasoul: (with his executioner's mask smells and sighs) Dawn! Jafar (Jasmine): I'll tell your boyfriend good-bye for you, Princess. Sultan: When I get hold of you, Jafar... Jafar (Jasmine): I'm so worried. Iago: (squawk) Jasmine (in anger): How could you double-cross Aladdin after all he's done for you! Iago: Hey, do I insult your mother? Jasmine: (sighs) What are you doing now? Iago: Oh, what does it look like I'm doing? I'm trying to free the chump genie so he can save your chump boyfriend! (squawk!) Jasmine: You have to lift it higher! Iago: Sure. No problem. (Setting: The Executioner's Pavilion at Sunrise along with the guards pushing Aladdin into the bladeless guillotine and Rasoul trying to behead him and Jafar (disguised as Jasmine) approaches.) Jafar (Jasmine): Wait! Aladdin: Jasmine! I knew you wouldn't go through with this. Jafar (Jasmine): I just wanted to say good-bye, street rat. Aladdin: Jafar! It's Jafar... (mumbled with the head mask) (Iago is lifting Genie in his crystal ball higher and higher, grunting and deliberately falls into the ground breaking and saving Aladdin from Rasoul cutting his head off with his sword during his execution and he takes off the head mask) Thanks for saving me! Genie: Oh, come on, Al. You know I had to. That no-head look is just not you. For my next trick, bibbidy bobbidy boo! Oh-ho, and everybody's safe and sound. Jasmine: Aladdin! Abu: Aladdin! Aladdin: Good to see you, too, Abu! There's somebody else who wants to talk to you. Iago: Hello. Aladdin: You set me up! How could you show your face? You're nothing but a... Jasmine: Aladdin, Iago rescued us. He didn't have to, but he did. Aladdin: Rescued? Him? Iago: Please note... "Did not have to, but did." Now we should be fleeing for our lives if you don't mind! Aladdin: No! We have to stop Jafar! Jasmine: But how? He's so powerful! Genie: His lamp. You destroy Jafar's lamp, you destroy Jafar. Aladdin: Then that's what we'll do! Iago: Reality check. Jafar is large and in charge. Sultan: Yes. There's no telling what Jafar will do to Agrabah. We have a responsibility! Iago: Maybe you do, but I don't! I'm only responsible for me, myself, and nobody! Aladdin: I understand Iago. You've done enough. And thanks! Iago: Hey, I did my good deed! I don't owe you a thing! You hear me! Not a thing. (Setting: The Sultan’s Throne Room, but Jafar is laughing evilly filled with echoes) Jafar: Now that my revenge is complete that is one little matter left to resolve. Abis Mal: Yes! The wish! Jafar: Indeed. You will now wish me free of this wretched lamp! Abis Mal: No! My wish! You got what you wanted! Now it's my turn! Jafar: But you don't need to waste your third wish. You want the sunken treasure of Coeur du Mer? It's yours! Abis Mal: (cheering and laughing excitedly) Yes, yes, yes! Yes! I love it! I love it! Silver! Lots and lots of it! Oh, I'm so excited! So this means I could have more stuff? I always wanted one of those! Nice! More! More! (Genie's hand is smashed with the golden eagle statue) Sultan: Oh, dear! Jafar: Now, if it's obscenely excessive enough, perhaps you'd care to grant my freedom. Abis Mal: Huh? What? Oh, yeah, right. Wish you were free. Sure thing, yeah. I wish for Jafar to be... Wait. How do I know that these things won't disappear once I set you free? Jafar: The more pressing question is… how will you stay alive if you don't?! Abis Mal: But, but you said genies can't kill! You said that! Jafar: You'd be surprised what you can live through. What?! Abis Mal: Huh? Hey! Aladdin: I'll take that! Abis Mal: My lamp! Gimme! Jafar: The street rat? Still alive? No! Aladdin: Help! Thanks, Genie! Where's the lamp? Jasmine: The lamp! Genie Jafar: Not so fast! Aladdin: Give it up, Jafar! We're obviously too much for you to handle! Genie Jafar: You! You're a fool to challenge me! I am all-powerful! Aladdin: Some all-powerful. You can't even get rid of a lowly street rat. Genie Jafar: A problem I mean to rectify right now! Jasmine: Aladdin! Genie Jafar: What? Genie: Gotcha! Go, Al! Jasmine: Genie! Aladdin: Faster, Carpet! Carpet, no! Jasmine: Aladdin! Genie, wake up! Abu: Wake up! Genie Jafar: (laughing) Give it up, boy! You shall never have my lamp... and there is no one to save you this time. Iago: Hey, Jafar! Shut up! (flying to get his lamp from the rock standing) Aladdin: Iago? Genie Jafar: Traitor! (uses his energizing power with his eyes like lightning bolts injuring Iago in his left wing) Jasmine: No! Genie Jafar: (laughing evilly) Good help is so hard to find these days. Isn't it, Aladdin? (laughing evilly again, but Iago kicked Jafar’s black lamp into the melting magma and lava with his foot) (gasping) My lamp! No! Aladdin: Iago! Abu: Oh, boy! (High fiving and bumping on Carpet friendly) Aladdin: Iago. Jasmine: No! Aladdin: But I thought a genie couldn't kill anyone. Iago: You'd be surprised what you can live through. (coughing & before Genie & Jafar said his quote) Aladdin: All right! Abu: Oh, boy! Jasmine: Oh, Iago! Genie: (shouting and cheering with Abu and Carpet) He's alive! (turning into a red firework rocket again and they’re fireworks bursting at night) Iago: And so the bird lived happily ever after, wallowing in luxury as Aladdin's palace pal. (in the Sultan’s cushion bandaged with his left foot and arms plus his head) Sultan: Now, my dear boy or should I say, my new vizier? Iago: Oh, say it! Aladdin: Sultan, I'm very honored, but... Iago: But?! What but? "But" is such a strong word! Abu: Why, I oughta... (Carpet grabbing Abu trying to hit Iago) Aladdin: I can't be your vizier. Iago: What?! (grabbing the Sultan’s shirt) Sultan, the boy's talking crazy talk! Don't listen! (yelling at Aladdin) What more do you want? Aladdin: The world. Iago: Look, personally, I'm with you, kid but let's take it one step at a time. (his beak was shut in bandages) Aladdin: I mean... I want to see the world. I can't just stay in the palace. (looking at the city of Agrabah in balcony view) There's too much to do, too much to see. Iago: Hey, what about your girlfriend? Do you think that this lovely princess is just going to wait around here? (squawking and putting him down by Rajah’s paw to keep him shut) Jasmine: I most certainly will not! Iago: There, you see? Jasmine: I'm going to see the world, too. Iago: OK, that's it! The madness is spreading! (squawk) Crazy talk! (flying around) Why do I keep getting hooked up with these warped people? (Final setting: The City of Agrabah at night) Shouldn't somebody ask what the brave parrot wants to do? (Bonus Setting: (Post-credits) The Palace’s Gardens at night with Abis Mal hanging from a tree after Jafar’s death and defeat) Abis Mal: Does this mean I don't get my third wish? Category:Disney Category:Aladdin Transcripts Category:1994